My Soul’s Calling

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What is your heart’s desire?

Which wishes linger inside of you, deep down, and are waiting to be awoken from their sleep?

Which dreams are secretly wanting to be fulfilled?

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For many years, I had the feeling that I wasn’t fully paying attention to my own desires. I would put another person’s needs before my own. And I would loose contact with my own longings. Or I would chase a dream I thought was mine, but wouldn’t feel fulfilled when that dream became manifested – realizing I was living someone else’s plan for me.

Ever since I started teaching – about eight years ago – I dreamt about teaching big groups of people making use of the deep healing powers of dance. In the beginning, I was happy to have groups of four to twenty people. And sometimes, only one or two people would join my classes. It wasn’t always easy, and I started doubting myself many times, but I kept showing up. I kept listening to what my heart asked me to do. Last month, I was being asked to be a ceremonial leader for Ecstatic Dance Amsterdam. While I was tuning into this evening, I all of a sudden realized that my dream was coming true. And there I was.. standing in front of 160 movers and dancers – many of them experienced and with a clear knowledge of the practice. Their eyes looking at me, their ears waiting for me to lead them into movement, their Souls celebrating their willingness to connect with their true essence. And I, nervous as hell yet grounded in my body, allowing the love for dance to simply float through me. Telling myself: “You have been doing this for so many years.. Just be the dance. Don’t do anything. Just be. Be-come the dance. And oh yes, don’t forget to breathe!” I left that evening feeling touched, moved, humble, grateful, vulnerable, dedicated and blessed – all at the same time.

Many times, we focus our wishes and dreams upon specific events. We want to have a big car. We want to find the perfect partner who has to tell us the perfect things. Or we loose contact with our dreams. We forget what we want. We search for what doesn’t serve us, and become sick or unhappy. We forget to ask ourselves: how do I want to feel myself? Which feelings do I want to experience once my dreams start coming through? More so, does it really matter what happens on the outside, if our inside is still struggling and maybe not even taking in the gifts that are given to us? It is all about being receptive. About opening up, even though it might be scary. About embracing all of our different personalities, all of our different emotions to take a place at the table. And to be a moderator. To listen to them. To find a middle way. Or to let one of them take over the meeting. But in the end.. It is up to us to decide. How do you want to feel? And how do you feel now, allowing yourself to dream out loud? To embody your own gifts? And to share them with the world? A friend once told me: “It would be criminal not to share your talents with the world.” And she was right. There is a time of diving in. Of meeting our fears. And then there’s a time to be bold. Courageous. And to take that one step, that allows us to fly.

A few days ago, I was reading a blog post of Marc Allen about his Keys to Success. He has a very inspiring story to share, as he started as a poor 30 year old, feeling anxious about fulfilling his dreams – with no job and no family support. He decided to sit down and write down the scene of how his ideal life would look like. Then he took another piece of paper and listed the goals he planned to accomplish, worded as affirmations. Such as: “In an easy and relaxed manner, in a healthy and positive way and for the highest good of all, I am now creating a thriving business.” He took his affirmations with him wherever he went, and started allowing himself to ‘work smarter, not harder’. Marc also kept repeating to himself that ‘once I get the inside right, the outside falls into place’. Five years later, almost every single one of his dreams got manifested as he became a millionaire! He created his Millionaire Course in which he shares his richness and wisdom with the world.

Especially in relationship with others, fears and resistances are being met – and we refer to them as ‘triggers’. In connection to my partner, I am being given a mirror of where I am not being clear, where I am not appreciating my own boundaries, and where I am wanting to do so good for the other, that I lose myself entirely. We all show each other mirrors. We are being asked to look into them wholeheartedly. And to embrace the fears that might arise. Living our dreams can be scary. As it gives us a feeling of vulnerability, of being naked. Vulnerability can be used as a power, if we allow it to transform us. If we don’t fight against it. Oh my, I am so good at fighting. At going into counter-attack, in stead of moving away from the attack. In stead of using my own energy for my own benefit. In stead of creating clear boundaries – loving yet grounded. It is a learning process. Time and time again, we are being asked to look our demons into the eyes – to enter the small room in our psyche where all of our darkest bones are being buried. And to bring them back to life. To move beyond naivite and fear, and to step into our own intuition and strength. As an empowered agent.

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Have you been feeling the calling lately to listen to your Soul even more carefully?

Do you wish to express your talents with the world more fully?

Or are you learning to share more deeply from the heart?

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Clarissa Pinkola Estes is a story teller and writer, known for her book ‘Women Who Run With the Wolves’. She talks about an inner predator living in the psyche of both men and women. This predator is a ‘contra naturam’ (against nature) force, which opposes the positive: it is against development, against harmony and against the wild. It can show up in dreams or might erupt our most soulful and meaningful plans. It severs us from our most intuitive nature. And it asks of us to practice a maturing of our own inner wisdom by listening to our inner voice, by asking of the right questions, by seeing what we see and hearing what we hear, and finally: by acting upon what we know to be true. Clarissa emphasizes: “These intuitive powers were given to your Soul at birth. They have been covered over, perhaps by years and years of ashes and excrement. This is not the end of the world, for these can be washed away. With some chipping and scraping and practice, your perceptive powers can be brought back to their pristine state again.”

Connected to these thoughts, questions and learning processes, I feel very blessed to invite you for a most unique event, held during the weekend of 6-7 June and co-facilitated by my dear friend Alessia Cartoni from Madrid. Alessia and I met each other in Bali, where we connected to life through beauty, dedication and creativity, and where we received a very strong vision to co-create and share our work with others. During this weekend, we will call forth YOUR gifts as we share our tool kit gained from years of experience working in dance, movement, theatre and music – both nationally and internationally. Together, we will weave a Web of Visions and create a safe and held space in which you can dive deeper into connection with your Soul’s Calling. The venue of Universa at Melkmarkt 4 in the heart of Antwerp has a beautiful view over the Cathedral. Be prepared to be surprised and to expect the unexpected..  Because who knows.. Dreams might come true! You can read more about this event through this link. I also give private Soul Coachings – face-to-face or through Skype. For more information, click here!

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To end this blog, I share with you another key from Marc Allen’s Millionaire Course: “You have everything you need: a miraculous body, a phenomenal brain, and a vast and powerful subconscious mind. Now it’s just a matter of focusing them in the right direction.” May you continue finding the right direction while listening to your Soul’s calling. May your dreams come true with ease. May you find your own power as you move forward. And may you feel supported by Life and Love.

Looking forward meeting and guiding you somewhere along the way!