Vulnerability Hangover

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This morning, I woke up feeling ashamed.

What’s wrong, I thought to myself? Yesterday, I shared a very connected sauna experience with a girlfriend. I had some beautiful dances this week. I am blessed with a wonderful home and partner. I can eat, breath and enjoy the sun.

And then, oh yes.. Reality struck. I exposed myself. I experienced an intense moment of vulnerability. Of sharing my fears with other sisters. My struggles. My confusion. Did I truly share this part of myself with others? What will they think of me now?

Shame and blame.

The two angry sisters that keep us, women, small and disconnected from ourselves and our own strength. The two antidotes for true openheartedness.

But truth for so many of us. A sensation that lowers our energies, that takes away our joy and that blocks itself inside of our stomachs.

Brene Brown calls this experience the ‘vulnerability hangover’. If you really take that big step and make yourself vulnerable, then it is pretty likely that the next morning you’ll wake up thinking, ‘Oh my God! Why did I share that? What was I thinking?’

Sounds familiar?

The true medicine for shame is empathy – sharing – being heard – being seen for who you really are. What can support us is to seek connection with someone who is going to lend us an empathic ear, someone who is able to listen to us and endeavour to understand our fears, anxieties and uncertainties.

And this is one of the (many) reasons why we come together in circle. To share – from the deepest core of our being. And to listen – show up – lend our ear to each other – and mostly: to ourselves. To allow ourselves to be – and to dare greatly.

Without exposing ourselves, making that human connection we need to combat shame is nearly impossible. So I invite you – including myself – to come as you are. To bring all of yourself. Fully.

You are so welcome.